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Here to Help

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"We TOLD you it was hard." "Yeah, but now that I'VE tried, we KNOW it's hard."
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vl
24 days ago
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Instead of algorithms it should be machine learning of course.
Seattle, WA
popular
24 days ago
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5 public comments
eraycollins
24 days ago
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Suggest having this strip at hand when reading Cathy O'Neil's book, Weapons of Math Destruction.
Covarr
24 days ago
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For the last time, Joe, an algorithm can't explain why kids love the taste of Cinnamon Toast Crunch!
Moses Lake, WA
chusk3
24 days ago
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My life in a nutshell
Austin, Texas
alt_text_bot
24 days ago
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"We TOLD you it was hard." "Yeah, but now that I'VE tried, we KNOW it's hard."
JayM
24 days ago
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ROFL. :)
Atlanta, GA

The Year the Holiday Plans Were Upset

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Some of my friends are talking about how they’re not going home for Thanksgiving or Christmas, because, at least for this one year, they can’t be with their family members who voted for Trump.

I don’t have this particular problem — my plans are to see family here in Seattle.

But here’s what I want to say: your family loves you, and not that many people in the world do, and you love them.

And I’ve had last Thanksgivings and last Christmases with several family members, and I never knew at the time it was the last one. You just can’t know.

I’m so glad I don’t have to make this decision myself. I understand both sides, and I wouldn’t criticize anybody for choosing either way.

It just sucks that anybody has to think about this. But they do.

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vl
192 days ago
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Pardon the frankness, but you are making a mistake. Go to your parents and go to protest. Trumps come and go, family stays.
Seattle, WA
swcope
191 days ago
The thing is I'm not sure they really do love me. Not the real me anyway. I haven't been able to be myself around them in nearly a decade. Not without them screaming or talking over me. And for what its worth, my "alternative lifestyle" they disapprove of is being a working mom with a husband who pitches in around the house. I am so tired of fighting them and putting up with their bullshit. I would rather spend my time with the people who do care than my awful family.
samuel
192 days ago
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This is the position I'm in. My parents are immigrants who live in Ohio and I cannot come to terms with their position and their vote. They were not misled by media; they were honest Trump supporters who somehow believe he would be best for our country. They don't believe me about any of the racism or bigotry that's showing up in his administration, never mind the last 18 months.

I wrote an open letter to them but I have yet to publish it about my decision to not come back this year for Thanksgiving, instead paying the $75 plane ticket change fee to protest in D.C. on January 20th.
The Haight in San Francisco
ambirex
192 days ago
Samuel, I'm sorry that you are faced with this. This was a hard election on many people. Take care with those you love and yourself. "I'm not giving up and neither should you"
smadin
192 days ago
I hope that you have nearby friends and chosen family with whom to celebrate—and prepare resistance. The years to come will be bad, and solidarity will be necessary.
theprawn
192 days ago
I'm on the same boat. I'm making the choice to go see family but am anxious about what conversations could come up... What I'll say if they do.
superiphi
192 days ago
If you feel you can't sit at the table with them this year, not without having possibly irreparable arguments. A bit of time will help. But in your parents corner, remember they are probably surrounded by people and messages that were all consistently pro trump, anti Hillary, anti establishment, with everyone believing them...
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Shinola Runwell Turntable

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Developed in collaboration with Harry Weisfeld, founder of high-end manufacturer VPI, the Shinola Runwell Turntable is the first in a new line of audio products from the Detroit-based brand. The...

Visit Uncrate for the full post.
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vl
208 days ago
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"Custom built cartridge", sure, a great way to fuck up.
Seattle, WA
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gradualepiphany
211 days ago
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Pretty.

Shame about the price.
Los Angeles, California, USA

Finalists in the 2016 Comedy Wildlife Photography Awards

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Funny Wildlife

Funny Wildlife

Funny Wildlife

Funny Wildlife

The finalists in the 2016 Comedy Wildlife Photography Awards have been announced.

Tags: best of   photography
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vl
220 days ago
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Seattle, WA
samuel
220 days ago
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The Haight in San Francisco
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dreadhead
219 days ago
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A+
Vancouver Island, Canada
wmorrell
220 days ago
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😂

How Hampton Creek Sold Silicon Valley on a Fake-Mayo Miracle

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Olivia Zaleski, Peter Waldman, and Ellen Huet, writing for Bloomberg Businessweek:

In January 2014 a Creeker on the West Coast, who asked not to be identified, received an assignment in an e-mail under the subject line “Secret Shopper Squad Stores.” She was directed to buy 20 bottles a week of Just Mayo from each Whole Foods store in a large territory. […]

After the secret purchases, the e-mail instructed, she should open one or two bottles at home to check for quality — specifically, whether the mayonnaise had separated. If the jars were all right, she could donate the rest to a food bank or give it to friends. “Do not return them to Whole Foods,” the e-mail said. It also included a link to a quality-assurance survey the Creeker was supposed to fill out for each store. But no one noticed when she didn’t do it. Within weeks she had bought so much Just Mayo that her friends and local food banks couldn’t handle any more, so she began dumping it. She spent almost $12,000 purchasing the product, she says, and she could tell the buybacks had nothing to do with quality control. “But I really didn’t think about it because I cared so much about the cause.”

With the buyback program in full swing, Tetrick celebrated the product’s success. “Wow! Some @WholeFoods are selling 100+ jars of #justmayo/day,” justmayo/day,” he tweeted on Jan. 30. Four months later, a company tweet said: “Proud to announce that #justmayo is now the #1 1 selling mayo at @wholefoods.”

This is just outright fraud, and Tetrick doubled down on it with his claims that the buy backs were only for the purposes of quality assurance.

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vl
245 days ago
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I use Vegenaise and it tastes good enough for me. In fact I prefer it's taste to "real" mayo.
Seattle, WA
samuel
245 days ago
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Auuuugh! And the mayo's delicious, they should have just let it speak for itself. Seriously, a vegan mayo that tastes just as good as egg-based mayo is a win for everybody.
The Haight in San Francisco
duerig
245 days ago
A good product that slowly expands to fill a new niche is not enough any more. Unless your product has a growth curve steeper than smartphones did, it is a failure. I wonder how many good ideas have been destroyed by this crazy logic.
rtreborb
244 days ago
I didn't know people cared about mayo this much
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recent TV

jwz
1 Comment and 2 Shares
In lieu of sleeping, I watch television. I have opinions. In no particular order, here's some stuff I've watched recently:

  • Preacher: This is the best thing on TV right now, and is an amazingly faithful adaptation of the comics. I haven't read them in years, but I loved the shit out of them back in the day, and so far this is doing justice to all of the characters. Cassidy, especially, is spot on. The TV version of Tulip is much more interesting, too: in the show she's a person, but in the comic she was The Girlfriend. The first season seems to be building to Jesse giving The Sermon in the finale, and just about every episode ends with an "Oh shit, here it comes" feeling. I am loving this so much.

  • Mr. Robot: Season one was absolutely incredible in every particular. It's impossible to talk about my favorite parts without massive spoilers, but there's a bit where they do a cliché thing and you're thinking "Oh, you're not going to do the cliché thing are you?" and then there's an instrumental music cue that is the most perfect music cue of all time because in just a few seconds it says, "Not only are we doing the cliché thing but we know it and we know you know it and we are going all in on the cliché thing."

    Also: it is best to view Mr. Robot as a sequel to Pump Up the Volume in much the same way that Grosse Point Blank is a sequel to Say Anything (Lloyd Dobbler found that kickboxing didn't work out and joined the army) and that Don't Trust the Bitch in Apartment 23 is the prequel to Jessica Jones (back when Jessica and Patsy lived together before meeting Killgrave -- Jessica was way more fun and less uptight back then).

    Anyway, season two of Mr. Robot is not really impressing me yet. I hope they get their shit together.

  • The Magicians: It took me a few episodes to warm to this, because I have no time for Harry Potter (a series about how hard it is being the popular jock who's good at everything) and this series sounds like it's going to be "Hogwarts, The Graduate School Years", but it's not really that, and it gets pretty dark pretty fast, e.g., the "C. S. Lewis / Lewis Carroll was a pedophile" subplot. It feels much more "real world" than most shows about magic do, and the characters actually have recognizable personalities. This show is excellent.

  • The Expanse: This might be the best science fiction I've ever seen on TV. It's actually science fiction, not "a western in spaaaace" like so much that passes for it is. The world-building is amazingly complex, the politics seem sensible, it has good characterizations, and probably the best physics I've seen in a scifi TV or movie since 2001. The writers understand gravity and inertia if you can believe that. I know, right?

  • Stranger Things: I would like to thank everyone who has been raving about this show for being so vocal about it, and thereby letting me know that I should utterly disregard your opinion on everything, ever. This is the biggest piece of trash I've seen since... well, since the last piece of saccharine pabulum that Spielberg vomited onto the screen. It's a ham-handed Spielberg / Stephen King pastiche, and it's just as bad as the warmed over, Very Special Episode 80s crap it is imitating, but nostalgia is a hell of a drug, so the fact that it is doing a decent job of imitating barely-remembered crap passes for depth with a lot of people, I guess?

    This is a show that had Amnesia Psychic Girl actually say the line, "Friend? What is friend?"

    Someone actually wrote that down. Someone wrote that down and thought, "Yes! Nailed it!"

    There is a makeover montage. A god damned makeover montage.

    It's basically this:

  • Orphan Black: Still amazing. Watch this show! If you are even remotely considering watching Sense8, stop that, and watch this instead, because anything that was interesting in Sense8 was already covered by Orphan Black by season 3, and in a less stupid way, and using characters you actually give a shit about (most of whom are played by the same person, which I still can hardly believe).

  • Wynonna Earp: This show is pretty dumb, but it's fun-dumb in the way mid-series Supernatural was dumb (the period when they kind of just said "fuck it" to making any sense, but before they ran out of ideas). The first few episodes are kind of hard to take, mostly because the writers didn't seem to be in agreement over whether the little sister's character was supposed to be 16 or 25, but it picks up. There's a lot of shooting demons in the face, and it's the most "open carry" show I've ever seen. I wonder what part of Canada is standing in for Arizona here.

  • Fear the Walking Dead: This show exists solely to remind you that The Walking Dead could be so much worse. You will love this show if you watched The Walking Dead and said to yourself, "You know what this show was missing? All of the incuriosity, pointless secret-keeping and one-note unsympathetic non-characters that I came to expect from Lost." This show is the walking embodiment of, "Why did the character decide to do the thing? Because the plot demanded it." Fuck this show.

  • Dark Matter: I call this "Amnesia Firefly". If you give your characters amnesia, they don't have to have personalities! If you keep giving them amnesia over and over again, you can keep rewriting the same episode! Avoid.

  • Killjoys: It's another Firefly ripoff, and it's not a whole lot better, but at least two of the characters have something approaching motivation. There seems to be some complex world-building in the background, but it's a slow reveal.

  • Powers: The first half of season one was pretty lousy, but it picked up (naked Eddie Izzard eating people! how can you not love that!), and season two is getting good. If you watched the first season of Heroes and wanted to throw things at the TV the whole time, this might be the show that you wished that was.

  • Penny Dreadful: Or, "The League of Extraordinarily Bloody Gentlemen". Season one was perfection. Season two was pretty good. Season three was a betrayal: just avoid it.

  • Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt: I find this show hilarious. Apparently the people who do not find this show hilarious are people who did not find 30 Rock hilarious. So let that be your guide.

  • Crazy Ex-Girlfriend: Ok, stay with me here. This is actually a musical. Like, a full-on, people stop talking and break into song and dance numbers three times an episode musical. How did this happen? How is this a thing that exists? How is this so funny? Because it's really funny. It's as if Kimmy Schmidt was produced by Bialystock and Bloom.

  • Black Sails: There is really a lot of excellent pirating in this show. Excellent pirating. Pirating and whoring and quite a lot of historically accurate pubic hair. The seasons tend to bog down and get a little talky in the middle, but they bookend it with some amazing naval battles. And even when it's talky, it's pretty great. Like this:

    Flint: That's not why you did it.

    Silver: Really? Would you like to tell me why I did it, then?

    Flint: Well, I wasn't there, but, I'd hazard the guess that you learned of what had happened, told him how fucking stupid he was, and in that moment, he gave you a look that amounted to something less than contrite. And in that moment, you felt it.

    Silver: Felt what?

    Flint: Darkness. Hate. Showing indifference to the authority that you sacrificed so much to acquire, disdain for refusing to acknowledge that his actions, had you not intervened, would have led to an outcome that he would have held you responsible for reversing. Pride. Questioning what kind of man you are if you don't seek retribution for the offense.

    Silver: So what are you saying? You saying I went too far with him?

    Flint: Maybe you went too far. Maybe you didn't go far enough. Maybe you did it just right. The point is that while you were doing it, you heard a voice telling you that disciplining him would prevent him from repeating the offense, a voice that sounded like reason, and there was reason to it, as the most compelling lies are comprised almost entirely of the truth. But that's what it does. Cloaks itself in whatever it must to move you to action. And the more you deny its presence, the more powerful it gets, and the more likely it is to consume you entirely without you ever even knowing it was there. Now, if you and I are to lead these men together, you must learn to know its presence well so that you may use it ... Rather than it use you.

    Also, it's a prequel to Treasure Island. You don't need to know anything about Treasure Island to follow it, but if you want to, I recommend the 1934 version.

  • Outlander: Our protagonist's problem is that she's just too smart and too good at everything, and too many people keep falling in love with her, so she keeps needing to be rescued by a brooding shirtless kilt. This is the most "Mary Sue" thing I have ever seen in my life. It's awful.

  • Lucifer: Speaking of Mary Sues, this show is basically identical to Castle: that is to say, "I don't give a shit about your stupid mismatched-buddy-cop police procedural -- oh, no chief, please don't partner me with the witty and charming outsider" -- but I watched it for a few episodes because that guy is kind of charming. But yeah, I gave up on it.

  • Ash vs Evil Dead: So, remember that scene, where Bruce Campbell is fighting his possessed hand and it keeps smashing plates over his head? If you want to see a series that is basically that scene over and over again, this is the series for you. (Note: I do, and so this is the series for me.)

  • Another Period: This is the actually-watchable version of Downton Abbey.

  • Outcast: How can you make exorcisms so boring?

  • 12 Monkeys: This is pretty lousy, and it's clear at this point that the writers have no plan at all, and are going to just keep palimpsesting over the plot as needed to keep it going. Bleh. But you have to admire what's-his-name's commitment to maintaining 5 days of stubble. It's a Miami Vice level of tonsorial devotion.

  • Blindspot, Gotham, The Strain: These shows are bullshit.

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vl
302 days ago
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Seattle, WA
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jsled
297 days ago
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«Also: it is best to view Mr. Robot as a sequel to Pump Up the Volume in much the same way that Grosse Point Blank is a sequel to Say Anything (Lloyd Dobbler found that kickboxing didn't work out and joined the army) »
South Burlington, Vermont
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